Secretly, our family with children WANT us living the Kid-Free Life.

It doesn’t matter how many times in their younger days Mommy and Daddy woke up curled around a toilet wondering who the person they are handcuffed to is.  To their kid, they are just a couple of old fogeys with bad hair who totally dork out every time the radio plays an 80’s tune.

When the time comes to talk a niece down off a stripper pole, Mommy and Daddy will be powerless.

On the other hand, Uncle Mikey and Aunt Amy will still have street cred. Our house will be the first stop the eloping couple will take on their way to Vegas – where, as we pretend to be open to the idea of funding this little escapade, we will actually be using Jedi Mind Tricks to talk Wild Neice out of releasing the hand of the guy with “187” tattooed to his cheekbone in old English font.

That’s right. You want us on that wall.

You NEED us on that wall.

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